How To Find Your True Beauty

Photo by Bekah Russom on Unsplash.

Photo by Bekah Russom on Unsplash.

I have two young girls, 5 and 3 years old. They both adore dress up! They love costumes, dresses, make-up, painted nails, the whole bit. They are girly, girls when it comes to clothes. 

My two girls picked out particularly pretty dresses one morning. After donning their outfits, my 5-year-old, Aubrey, jumped up on a chair to admire at herself in the mirror. She stood there enjoying what she saw.

Then she proclaimed with enthusiasm, “I’m so beautiful!” No shame, no apprehension–with full assurance. She knew beyond a shadow of a doubt she was exactly that–beautiful! 

Then she encouraged her little sister to join her on the chair. She exclaimed, “look, Grace, you’re so beautiful!” as Grace admired her own reflection in the mirror.

There delight in themselves was so sweet and innocent. They felt beautiful and they believed they were beautiful. My heart beamed! 

Then it hit me–what happened to us between 5 years old and now!? How many of us woman look in the mirror each morning and say with enthusiasm, “I’m beautiful!”?

Hardly any of us I’d wager. Most of us are holding back the criticism or worse, declaring our criticism freely. We see every flaw, every imperfection and every cellulite dimple that we believe makes us the opposite of beautiful.

We compare, we deflect, we criticize. 

I know life happened to us between 5 years old and now. I know it’s been hard. I know we’ve had hurts, betrayals, and crushing defeats. I know that for some of us, we’ve struggled with weight, wrinkles have crept in, and life seemed to beat us down. 

But, do those things have to really define whether we’re truly beautiful or not?

Beauty isn’t about perfection. It’s about loving who God’s created us to be. It’s about seeing past the imperfections so you can see your true self. 

You’re fearfully and wonderfully made, you’re hand knit together in your mother’s womb. (Psalm 139:13-14

What would happen if we started looking at ourselves in the mirror and declared with enthusiastic belief, “I’m beautiful!”?

Photo by hannah grace on Unsplash

Photo by hannah grace on Unsplash

I’d like to propose an experiment. 

For the next 30 days, look in the mirror, directly into your eyes, and say to yourself, “Who do I see?” Then answer yourself using only positive attributes of yourself.

I see:

  1. I’m beautiful!

  2. I have bright eyes!

  3. I’m peaceful!

  4. I’m joyful!

  5. I’m fun!

  6. I have a cheerful disposition!

  7. I love my hair!

Are you thinking to yourself, “Heather, I don’t have that many positive attributes about myself.” I appreciate your honesty, but I’m going to tell you straight out–you’re wrong. 

 Let’s go back to what your Creator says about you.

Psalm 139:13 - 18 AMP

13 For You formed my innermost parts; You knit me [together] in my mother’s womb.
14 I will give thanks and praise to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was being formed in secret, And intricately and skillfully formed [as if embroidered with many colors] in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were appointed for me, When as yet there was not one of them [even taking shape].
17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them!
18 If I could count them, they would outnumber the sand. When I awake, I am still with You.

Your Creator intricately and skillfully formed you as if He was embroidering with many colors! He’s also continually thinking how amazing you are! 

You, my beautiful friend, have many positive, amazing attributes!

We’ve just been telling ourselves the negative aspects of ourselves for so long, that’s the first thing we see. And, because of that, we’ve begun to believe that those are only traits.

By applying this simple experiment of looking at yourself and saying only the positive traits you see, you’re reframing and retraining your brain to see the positive traits about you–what your Creators sees about you first! You’re agreeing with Him!

As you do this, just like your 5-year-old self, you’ll begin to believe it.

So will you dare to join me? For the next 30 days, will you, look in the mirror, directly into your eyes, say to yourself, “who do I see?” and then answer yourself using only positive attributes of yourself?


I would love to hear how this experiment goes for you? How did you feel the first day? How about 15 days in? What happened at day 30?


Blog Posts:

How To Stop Sabotaging Yourself And Your Happiness a post   

How Do You Know What You’re Worth a post  

 How To Discover Who You Really Are a post

How To Believe The Truth About Who You Really Are a post

Realigning Yourself post by Sandy Lawson of



Without Rival: Embrace Your Identity and Purpose in an Age of Confusion and Comparison by Lisa Bevere

Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely book by Lysa TerKeurst

Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left Out, and Lonely, Study Guide by Lysa TerKeurst

(Lisa shares heartfelt stories of rejection and how she learned to embrace who God’s created her to be. This is a powerful book. The study guide will also guide you through a journey of questions you may not think to ask yourself.)

The 4:8 Principle: The Secret To A Joy-Filled Life by Tommy Newberry

(This book has an excellent section on our self-concept and our thought-life, which is vital to how we see ourselves)

*All books are affiliate links